Thankyou- Sleep update

Firstly, let me say thankyou so very much to everyone who commented on this post about Busy and her sleep situation. I was quite overwelmed by the respose ( in a good way)  and I just couldn't believe the amazing resource this blog became... I know I could have done a google search about sleep and toddlers but there would be soooo much crapola to wade through... I think I replied to everyone who wrote and I really appreciate that many of you took the time to actually write down some really long comments- and some of you even offered to lend me books - you guys are just to great.... it warmed my cockles it did, and for that I say Thankyou Very Muchly.

So. We have decided to gaffa tape her mouth shut.

Not really.



But the solution was very simple. We have cut out the day sleep. It has actually been OK. She has not been nearly as cranky as she has other times when she hasn't slept and she may be a little bit more emotional but it's really not bad at all. We just have to get her doing something she likes... There may still be times where she has a sleep in the afternoon and that will mean she will be up late- but if its not EVERY night then it doesn't bother us. If she does have a sleep in the afternoon then we are not even going to try to put her to sleep until 9pm.

Basically what I have come to realise is she has a 12 hour clock. She needs to sleep for 12 hours in every 24hours.  And really we can't fight that. I can't make her sleep longer. I don't want the stress of trying. She will either sleep 2 hours during the day and 10 hours overnight or 12 hours overnight. It really is quite simple. It is her rythym.  We aren't laying down with her anymore, just sitting on the bed, thats helping, but because she now goes to sleep in about 15 mins- after stories and cuddles and all that stuff -its all good.

help me mummies

Over here, at the little house in the middle of the forest,  all is not so well. You see the parents of the little creature referred to as Busy are having strong feelings around the routine they have found themselves in. I knew this was  bound to happen sooner or later. She was a great sleeper from day one and she was breastfed to sleep for the first 2 years- which I don't regret at all and would do again- and then we just started laying with her. She still has a day sleep- god knows come 1p.m ish - we all need a moment to oursleves- and it is my most precious of sewing time. But when she sleeps during the day it can take up to an hour to get her to sleep at night- at about 815-830 we do the usual , quiet time before bed, then stories in bed and lay with her until she falls asleep- this last bit has become very wearing.

She sleeps on a double bed on the floor so its quite comfy- therein lies the problem, (Chef and I take it in turns to do the bed routine) and whoever does it falls asleep and then the spouse comes and wakes them and then the woken spouse is all cranky ( I am far more of a cranky pants than Chef in this situation) and they end up going straight to bed and then we don't spend any time alone together talking as adults- or gigleing in bed like we use to...and I miss it.... I will not do anything that invloves her screaming herself to sleep or anyone feeling upset or horrible or  feeling awful about it - but surely there is a gentle way of getting her to go to sleep by herself without us having to lay there. I am happy to stay with her for a little while but an hour? Or am I being unreasonable???

Points to consider: ( jeez- do I sound like I am asking you to write an essay?)

• She will go to sleep at daycare in about 5 minutes by herself and has been doing so for 2 YEARS! It takes an hour regardless of how huge the day is - no matter how worn out she is it still takes ages.
• if we drop the day sleep we have an afternoon of hell and she usually still won't go to sleep unitl 830 anyway- but we are actually trying it this afternoon- to see how we go...

• and of course she crashes in the car easily to but wakes up as soon as you try to move her...

Help!!!??? what do you do? how did you teach your little one to go to sleep in a safe and gentle way ?